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THE PROPHELIAR

Adunola listened on as prophet Olumose received a call from the United States.

Prophet Olumose had downed several bottles of beer at the traditional wedding Adunola and Jide,her fiancée attended.

He  had  become  tipsy  and  when Jide  introduced  him  to  her  as  his  long  talked  about  friend  and prophet, she had been taken aback at the slur in his voice, the glaze in his eyes and his tipsy demeanor.

He was so loud, lousy and was letting out huge belches intermittently.

Adunola was so shocked at his lack of decorum.

He had a bottle of beer clutched under his armpit and Adunola had been tempted to ask if Jide was sure this was the prophet he had spoken so highly about.

Adunola began to wonder what kind of a man Jide was to believe in this man who obviously lacked morals; she wondered how this man could espouse the values, devotion and humility that is ingrained in Christianity not to talk of espousing the values of the person of a prophet of God.

Adunola watched in total disbelief as Prophet Olumose stood up with all agility when the popular song by Small Doctor belted out of the loud speaker and everywhere went agog.

Prophet  Olumose with his bottle of beer clutched under his armpit, dancing and screaming “Ye masun gba koje, gege renge ti ge, go go rogo rogo”.

He  pushed  his  bum  to  the  back,  puts  his  right  hand  on  his  head  with  his bottle  of  beer  tightly clutched  under  his  left  arm,  dancing  and  screaming  with  all  abandon.

“Ijo  ti  mo  jo  lanan  woun pariwo, eni nko, ola nko otunla ewe, iyen be n be awa lani lu atorin ee ma kolo oo, ehhhhhhhhh”🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶”

Adunola watched  in  mortification  as  Prophet  Olumose  guzzled  another  round  of  beer  from  his bottle again and let out a loud belch.

In her entire life she had never seen a prophet behave like this Jide nudged her and said, “Adun don’t be like that, Prophet Olumose is just loosening up, being a prophet is a tough job, do you know how many customers erm sorry people he attends to daily?
The man needs some fun to cool off the tension and depression that could come out of attending and listening to different tales of woes from all over the world.”

Adunola  looked  at  Jide  in  disbelief  and  quickly  adjusted  her  expression  as  she  sighted  prophet Olumose walking up to them.“Proph” that was what Jide called him face to face, “we would be leaving now egbon (big bro), the
wedding party is rounding up already.”

“Ah ok Jide, please hold on let me say bye bye to some few people so we can leave together. I would love you to drop me somewhere on our way please.
“Ok, Proph anything for you egbon.”

As they drove out of the venue of the party Prophet Olumose’s phone rang and Adunola listened to his end of the conversation.

“Is that Madam Tinuade from the US, ah okkkkk, good afternoon my sister, God bless you, God bless you in the name of Jesus!!!

“Ahhhhhhhh, thank you Baba, yes Baba!”

“Madam Tinuade, as we speak now, I am made to see a very large green and fruitful tree.
The root of this tree is so wide and solid.
The tree is so tall and people were feeding on the fruits happily, and the tree kept on flourishing.”
“Ah thank you Baba!!!”
“Hmmmmm Jesus!!!”
“All of a sudden this tree was cut down and cut short by some angry people!!!”
“You are that tree madam Tinuade and you need to pray!!!”
“You need to pray oo ki a ma baa ge o lule lojiiji” (so that you would not be cut down suddenly)
“You need to pray hard because the enemies are planning and strategising on how to cut your life short.”
“I will send you some prayer points and some “spiritual works” you need to do.”

Prophet Olumose ended the phone conversation after a lot of scary utterances, guzzled his beer and let out a loud belch gleefully.

Adunola was so shocked but managed to compose herself, while she looked at Jide from her side eyes who acted as if nothing was wrong and like the whole attitude ProphetOlumose had been exhibiting since was a normal way of life.  Adunola knew she had entered one chance.

Kai! Adunola thought, this man is a “propheliar” and for Jide to have been associating with him this long means he has no personal values.

Chaiii this is one chance oooo!!!
How do I get out from this relationship before ruining my life Adunola thought?

She was far gone in deep thought when “propheliar” Olumose bellowed She was far gone in deep thought when “propheliar” Olumose bellowed “iyawo bawo ni o?”
“Hope you are ok?”
Adunola was shocked and almost screamed out in response the first gibberish that came to her mind,
“qu’est que Aya mi nja”!!! (What is it? I am afraid)
“Oui eru nba mi” (Yes I am afraid)
But she quickly adjusted, smiled at him and responded that she was fine while Jide told him she that she was usually a quiet person, and that she was fine.

******************************************************
One month later, Jide told Adunola he was coming with propheliar Olumose to her area to see some friends and that they would pick her on their way so she could go with them.
Adunola  wanted  to  say  no  but  Jide  had  been  so  good  of  late  and  she  had  been  acting  all  nasty looking for ways to call off the relationship. It was almost like Jide knew and he kept on acting so perfect and almost swaying Adunola’s heart.

However Adunola was raised by parents who espoused good values and trained her to do same. She could recognise people who lacked good values from afar and even if she tolerates them, she avoids having any long term relationship with them in whatever form.

Jide had almost deceived her but “propheliar” Olumose had exposed the real person he was to her. It’s only a matter of time before Jide began to show himself. She would not be getting married to him to find out, God forbid evil.

Jide  and  the  “Propheliar”  parked  outside  their  house  on  the  day  they  were  to  pick  her  up  and Adunola baded her elder sister goodbye.

Her elder sister, Adunade works in a multinational company in Lagos and she was one of the top shot  in  the  company.  Her  salary  ran  into  10million  naira  yearly,  aside  the  various  allowances  and other  packages  that  came  at  intervals.  She  is a  very  comfortable  woman  and  she  lived  a  very comfortable life.
Her only sibling was Adunola and she makes sure she spoils Adunola silly. As a matter of fact it was in the party thrown by Adunade’s company that Adunola met her fiancé Jide.
Jide was a younger brother to one of Adunade’s colleague at work. And at the party that night they both  seemed  to  hit  it  off,  result  of  which  had  become  a  relationship  which had  led  to  a  marriage proposal.

Adunade peeked through the curtain to see Adunola enter into the car, she noticed another man sat in front and just at that moment her eyes and that of the other man who was Prophet Olumose met.

She had a spooky feeling but she quickly dropped the curtain and went to sit down to continue to watch  the  movie  she  was  watching  before  Adunola  interrupted  her.  Adunade  was  not  too comfortable with Jide because of his elder brother Mike.

Mike gives her the creeps at work. Ever since he asked her out and she turned him down, she has not been  able  to  shake  off  the  feeling  that  Mike  resents  her.  She  had  a  feeling  she  rubbed  his  ego  the wrong way, but feels justified because she honestly cannot stand men who cannot accept rejection.
There is something darkly predictable about such men and she does not want to have anything to do with them.

**************************************
On entering Jide’s car the popular song by ‘Lanre Teriba’ was belting out of the speaker.
“Olorun mi tete sola damiloun lasiko mi, mama mi dogbo lo won ma fe jeun omo”(My God bless me quickly, my mother is getting old, she needs to begin to reap the fruit of her labour)
“Orisa bi iya kosi laye, Iya lalabaro omo, orisa bi iya kosi o,  Iya la labaro omo” (There is no deity like a mother, she is her child’s comforter)
Osu  mesan  ni  mogbe  pelu  obi  ninu  mama
mi(I  lived  with  the  placenta  for  nine  months  in  my
mother) ………..”
Adunola was humming along happily.
Jide knew how much she liked that song and she was so glad he was playing it. It melts her heart each time and she can’t
wait to begin to spoil her parents and Adunade her elder
sister silly for being her pillar of support. She told Jide this the first time she listened to that song.

Adunola  was  about  squeezing  his  head  from  behind  for  playing  one  of her  favorite  song  when Prophet Olumose interjected her move.

“Bawo ni o iyawo” Prophet Olumose said in a loud voice that startled Adunola.
“I am fine sir” Adunola had barely finished responding when “Propheliar” Olumose bellowed “yes Baba, yes!”

“Adunola I am made to see a giant tree, full of so many fruits.
This tree has a root that spreads widely in the ground.
It amasses a large space around it, its root and branches spreads widely day by day.
However all of a sudden people brought out all kinds of instrument and began to cut into this tree.
As they cut this tree, it bled.”
“Ah Baba thank you, thank you Baba mi loke(my father in heaven).”
“How can a tree bleed lord?”
“This only means that the tree is a different kind of tree, one of its kind.”
“This tree is a rare kind of tree”
“Hmmm eshe Baba”
“Ah Olorun oooo (GOD) at last the tree was cut down!”

“Adunola that tree is a woman that is very close to you.
The bread winner of your family and you need to act fast!”
“Ah that must be your elder sister Adunade, Jide chipped in”

“Adunola was very scared at this point and she screamed in response to Jide, “Ni oruko Jesu(In Jesus name) It’s not possible. It cannot be my sister, Jide!

Prophet  Olumose  spoke  on, ah  eshe  Baba,  the  God  that  vindicates,  I  see  a young  woman,hmmmmmm, so it must be your sister Iyawo!

Adunade  watched  in  fear  as  Propheliar  Olumose  rambled  on,  gradually  she  began  to  regain  her composure. Then suddenly she remembered the previous episode where “Propheliar” Olumose spoke to a woman on the phone in the USA while they were all in the car coming from that wedding party,that event was deeply etched in her memory.
The line were almost the same, the only difference was that this time around the Propheliar was more
skillfull, not drunk and a bit emotional”

“Ok sir, Adunola responded in a shaky voice, what can we do?”
“Good question iyawo, you would have to get her clothe without her knowledge, and any kind of item she uses on her head.”
“Get this items and bring the sum of #150,000 along with it, we would perform a kind of ritual by burying those items with her picture, and that would be it, she is delivered totally and no harm wouldbefall her.”
“As a matter of fact she would even excel more than she is doing now”
“Alright sir, I would do this immediately and get back to you this coming week sir”
“Ok iyawo, please do not waste time. Delay is dangerous”!

All the while Jide kept nodding his head in affirmation and kept telling the ‘propheliar’ that they weregoing to do this immediately.
Adunola smiled in her heart, this Propheliar feels her knowledge of God is not that deep. He needs to
try again.

After their outing, Adunola bade the men goodbye as they dropped her at the front of her home with Adunade,  and zoomed off.
She shook her head in total disgust and disbelief, “how did I get myself involved with Jide?”
Fear  almost  made  her  fell  for  this  trap.  Her  whole  relationship  with  Jide  looked  like  a  set  up,  as  a
matter of fact she just confirmed finally today that it was all a set up!
She knew she needed to quit the relationship immediately.
And that night she placed a call to him and told him it was over.
“Over?”
“How?”
“What happened?”
Adunola told him coldly to allow his conscience be the judge.“

“Hmmmm  Proph  was  right,  you  are  actually  an ogbanje!”  “Jide  screamed  into  the  phone accusingly.”
“He told me this the first time he met you, and that I should be careful with you because you were going to try to control my destiny.”
“However my love for you superseded his prophecy.”
“I love you Adunola please don’t do this to us Jide begged desperately.”
“I am sorry Jide, you are not the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. Please understand, I am sorry if I hurt you but my future is very important to me.”
“And from what I have gathered so far, you are not in that future.”
She bade him goodbye and disconnected the call.

She breathed down, looked up and saw Adunade at her door nodding her head in affirmation.
Adunade walked into the room, sat down on Adunola’s bed and gave her a big wide hug.
“Well done girl, I have always known you to be a wise woman, I knew the time would come when your relationship with him would finally get here.”
“You did right and I love you.”

Adunola squeezed Adunade in a deeper hug and shuddered at the manipulative supposed revelation the Propheliar saw, and the solution he proffered to it.
She pulled back, looked at Adunade in the eyes and muttered “I love you sis, and you mean the world to me”
“I love you too Adunola and I am your best cheer leader” she said amidst a chuckle and stood up to leave.

“Any dinner for me sis, Adunola said in a high pitched voice, Adunade responded from the corridor in  a  higher  pitch  “come  on  my  friend  will  ya  enter  the  kitchen,  I  am  famished  come  and  prepare something for us abeg!”
Adunola smiled to herself and screamed, “indulge me for once sis, I am heart brokennnnnnn”
“For your mindddddddd” Adunade responded.

*********************************
At the other end, Jide stared at his phone with a cold look after Adunola ended the call amidst his plea, he dialed Prophet Olumose’s number.

“Egbon, oka ti fo o (the cat has been let out of the bag), the silly girl just broke up with me”
“Mo so fun e pe emere lomo yen” (I told you that girl is possessed) said Prophet Olumose………………………..

THE END.

This is a true life story with just some little fictitious twists and turns.
I don’t know the lessons you have learnt in this but I know there are lots of lessons there.
You can share by dropping a comment

Oluwatosin Arowodudu
Publisher and Identity Coach at
Hadar Creations

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